When the Days are Heavy

I’ll be completely honest. As challenges arise daily for me as a mother, a partner, a friend, and a business owner, sometimes I find it difficult to even fake a smile for others. The positive energy to face the daily challenges is buried so deeply under stress and decision-making that sometimes I fear I have lost it forever. The weights we carry each day are heavy, my friend!

It is as if each day I pick up a backpack to carry that holds all of my tasks. Some days the backpack is light and easy. The weights of those days are manageable and even fun…but some days…and you know what I mean…it’s as if someone has filled my backpack with heavy stones and I struggle with each step. The weight of the backpack causes me to be out of breath, makes my back hurt, and buries my joy. What do you do when the weights of each day seem too heavy to move? 

When the days are heavy at home, it’s often because I am worried about my kids. Sometimes they cause me to worry about their actions or attitudes. Sometimes I am worried for them simply because of the world we live in today. Add another stone to my backpack, and the weight of each day is building. 

Sometimes I am too hard on myself as a mother and add even more stones to my backpack. I begin to compare myself to others and inevitably fall short. The grass is always greener in someone else’s yard. We really are too hard on ourselves way too often! Motherhood is beautiful, but at times it’s a hefty burden to carry. 

As a business owner,  I always want my customers to be happy. Even though that’s a top priority of The BeYOUtiful Boutiques, some things are simply out of my control. Vendors don’t always ship on time or even worse, they charge your credit cards for amounts that you have definitely not budgeted for. Figuring out how to manage others and run a business while at the same time learning to manage yourself is a complicated process, and I’m not always feeling up to the challenge. Those are the days my backpack feels unbearably heavy. 

So what do you do when the weight of each day is so heavy you don’t feel you can take another step? In those moments, I have to remember the power of relying on myself and focusing on the bigger picture. You can’t always call on friends or family for help when things go wrong and spin out of control– sometimes it's up to you.

Think about this: If we were faced with the decision to sink or swim, most of us would try swimming to save our lives, right? In that same vein, we have to swim through the currents of change and climb the mountains of life. We have to choose to carry on to the next moment because giving up is ultimately not an option.

keiauna white owner of the beyoutiful boutiques wearing a white tunic, smiling, and adjusting her glasses

When times get tough and I’m faced with the emotional changes, disappointments, highs, and lows of daily life, I often take a step back, meditate, and pray in confidence while reflecting on the words of Romans 8:28: “All things work together for the good of those that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose.” I release the burdens and stones in my backpack and give them to the one who can handle them. My backpack always feels lighter, then I do my best at whatever is in front of me that day. 

One of my tried and true quick fixes for when my backpack is feeling heavier than usual is looking in the mirror, smiling through the tears, and saying, “Girl, you’ve got this!” Sometimes I even loudly recite affirmations to remind myself of who I am and what I’m capable of. I almost always walk away with a lighter load…and I bet you will too! 

Find a way each day to lighten your load. I don’t mean neglecting the things you need to do or even putting them off- procrastination is one way our backpacks can get heavy very quickly! Just try finding some time to take a walk, read your Bible and pray, or call a friend for no reason other than to check on them and catch up. 

I personally find part of my strength to handle each day when I feel good about how I look. A good lipstick, a little mascara, and a cute outfit all go a long way when it comes to boosting your mood and building yourself up to meet whatever the day may bring. We almost always feel better when we look better. It can be hard to dress up and show up during the lows of life, but once you do, you literally see yourself in a different light! Your backpack is lighter, and you know you can and will get through the day!

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